Where Do I Begin?

Posted by Monica Edwards Categories: Personal

It has been a few months since I have had the passion to write. I say passion because I have figured something out about myself. I lack motivation, it’s true, but the unerring factor in my absence of recent posts is that I have not felt a passion to write. The definition of passion you ask? “strong and barley controllable emotion” or “an intense desire or enthusiasm for something”. Okay, so I HAVE felt a strong and barely controllable emotion in the last few months, more than once in fact, but I have not had the intense desire or enthusiasm to bring myself to share my experiences with anyone.

I don’t know why. I could take a guess and say that it has been a busy few months but that would just be a lame excuse. I suppose if I were entirely transparent, I would say that it is probably due to depression. It is extremely difficult to feel any sort of passion or motivation when I am in this state, and I feel like I do all the things that are necessary of me and the tasks that are not required of a mother and wife, I let fall by the wayside. I absolutely abhor being in this state and I know from being a part of a support group of women suffering from depression, that we as individuals, ultimately have control of how we want to, or choose to feel.

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