The Monica Edwards Weblog

Exposing Myself: For Better or Worse?

Posted by Monica Edwards
Categories: Family, Personal, Religious

Warning from Author: This post is extremely personal and contains some explicit details of my life that may be hard to read. I tried to edit the details as much as possible while still being true to myself by not holding back--I have been doing that for too many years.

October of 2007 was my last post. It has been about that long since I have laid eyes on my own blog. To do so would only compound the feelings of failure, guilt, and frustration I have been feeling for the last 6 months, no—let’s just lay it all out on the table—the feelings that I have battled with most of my life from prepubescence to present day. With the help of a therapist, my husband, and my trusty anti-depressants, I have chosen, made a conscious decision, to make another concerted effort to let you all in on my big bad secret. I have shared my story with a few that I trust. I make light of it as a way to distance myself so that I can actually put my thoughts into words without blubbering all over the keyboard.

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Blogger Envy

Posted by Monica Edwards
Categories: Alijah, Family, Personal, Tommy

My favorite blogger whom I have admitted to being a groupie of, Heather Armstrong of Dooce, writes a newsletter every month for her ‘cute as can be’ three year old daughter Leta. She recounts each past month for her in a way that touches my heart and makes me envious that I do not have the discipline to put down in words the very memories that she is able to; words that will hold them together as a family forever. Everytime I read one of these newsletters I just want to say to her, wow, you have described the very feelings that I have for my 3 year old.  I did not think such deep emotions could be put into words, but there they are. 

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My Name is Monica, and I Am a Heather Armstrong Groupie

Posted by Monica Edwards
Categories: Business, Personal

I have been back from San Jose and my first Blogher conference for a couple of days and I find myself with writer’s block even though I have only been blogging for just over a month. I am at a loss for something relevant to say because of the opportunity I had to not actually meet, but be in on the sessions led by amazing women who blog in their various voices and do it in such eloquent and at times hilariously side-splitting ways. I am feeling very juvenile in my style of writing. After actually reading a few of these sites by these women who are paving a way in the blogging world, I see why they are so well respected in their field. These are not your ordinary online journals, these stylish writings offer humor, history, and a front row seat into the lives of these writers. I found myself engrossed in one particular blog in fact, one written so brilliantly by Heather Armstrong. While I was in the session that she was sitting on the panel for, I was curious to see what kind of woman she was and what she wrote about that allows her to be able to make a living for her family, so that her husband could quit his job instead of working out of the home. What kind of content did she have that was so interesting, day to day in a personal blog? So I clicked on over to her site, dooce.com, and was glued to the screen from the start, I don’t think I blinked for 30 minutes straight, hence the tears that rolled down my face.

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